Graduation? But wasn't it just yesterday...

Graduation? But wasn’t it just yesterday…

It was just yesterday, so many years ago, when my granddaughter unexpectedly entered the world at 25 weeks gestation – four months early! She weighed less than 1 pound 7 ounces, dropping to a fraction over one pound! She was amazing. She was beautiful. I was in awe and humbled to witness the miracle usually reserved for God’s eyes alone.

“Peanut’s” eyes were not yet opened. Her dear little hands were the size of her grandfather’s thumbnail, complete with the tiniest fingernails you can imagine. When she would grab onto his finger, it looked like an adult grabbing a large tree limb. Her feet were scarcely an inch long. Her grandfather could literally hold her in the palm of his hand. She swam in the preemie clothes made by the Ladies Auxiliary, but she deserved something to wear. I bought a pattern for a 12” doll and made her a dress. The booties and panties were way too big.

Her prognosis? Nearly zero to none. Everyday was an emotional roller-coaster ride as we watched this tiny baby fight for her life. At that time, no infant that small had survived. We were often gently reminded, “Don’t get your hopes up.” Her life was so fragile that her great-grandparents drove 800 miles to meet their first great grandchild, and… to say “goodbye”, certain they would not see her again this side of Heaven.

***Notice the BIC pen at the bottom of the picture

But God…. He had other plans for this wee one, precious in His sight. Her name, longer than she was, had to be decided quickly by her mother because of the near certainty of her baby’s death. It means, “renewing”, “refreshing”; and it fits.

The Bible verse for her name is Job 33:4:

“The Spirit of God has made me;
The breathe of the Almighty gives me life.”

I wept when I read it; there was our hope.

Now, many years later (it seems like yesterday), “Peanut” has celebrated her 19th birthday! She has known many trials and hardship in her young life, but as she has grown and matured, she has allowed the One who gives her life to take those hard things and use them for good – molding her into a lovely young woman full of grace, inner beauty, strength, integrity, and much love. (And yes, she still has a delightfully feisty spirit, which I am convinced God gave her those many years ago that allowed her to fight for life.)

Just yesterday, over five years ago, we began her home education. In another month, she will graduate from high school! Homeschooling was one of the best decisions we ever made. She went from a shy, barely passing no-matter-how-hard-she-tried student to young woman full of life and confidence who will graduate high school with a 4.0! She has worked hard for her grades, very hard, but home school gave us the freedom to work with her strengths and learning styles. It also allowed her time to heal and grow at her pace.

Now we’re down to “graduation crunch time” and our days are filled with tying up loose ends: making sure school work is finished, addressing graduation invitations, decisions about the open house celebration, making alterations on her dress for the formal and oh yeah, cleaning the house for my in-laws, the same great grandparents who came to say “goodbye” so many years ago, are flying in to attend the graduation of their first great-grandchild! How cool is that!

The journey from yesterday to today has been a difficult one. Adding home school to the mix has required a lot of hard work and energy from both of us. But the blessings of it all have been rich and deeply fulfilling. I confess I am weary and part of me is glad to see graduation in sight, yet another part of me wells up with tears (like now) every time I think how “Peanut” has grown up. Soon this chapter of life will close and a new one begin. No doubt about it, however, I will relish the sight of seeing her in cap & gown receiving her diploma! (I’ll be the one blubbering – sorry Peanut )

As I consider all of this, I am reminded of the Fiddler’s words as he struggled with his emotion regarding the marriage of his daughter:

Is this the little girl I carried,
is this the little boy at play?
I don’t remember growing older,
when did they?

When did she get to be a beauty,
when did he grow to be so tall?
Wasn’t it yesterday when they were small?

Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset
swiftly flow the days.
Seedlings turn overnight to sunflowers,
blossoming even as we gaze.

Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset,
swiftly fly the years,
one season following another,
laiden with happiness and tears.

Yes, I’m weary; I won’t deny it. The road from yesterday has been hard. Knowing now the added work of home educating, would I still choose to do it? You bet – without a moments hesitation, only I’d start sooner

The Bible tells us life is but a vapor. It’s true. Yesterday becomes tomorrow in the blink of an eye. As Fiddler says, seedlings turn overnight to sunflowers, blossoming even as we gaze. Grab and savor every opportunity life extends to enjoy and spend time with your precious gifts!

Peanut, we are all so proud of you – mother, brother, grandparents and great parents! Congratulations! You did it!!! (Remind me to bring tissues to graduation, OK?)

(P.S. I have intentionally left out “Peanut’s” real name – although that’s what I often call her – and current pictures for safety reasons. OK, so…call me over-protective )

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This entry was posted on Thursday, April 23rd, 2009 at 10:29 am and is filed under Life Lessons. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.