Brick Wall Hits Home School
Ahhh….OK now….ah what was I doing? . . . . . Oh, I remember, I was getting ready to write a post about the brick wall that has hit our home school. No kidding, there we were working diligently on homeschooling and WHAM! - it jumped right in front of us.
Seriously, five plus years into home educating and this is the first time I’ve felt it would be easier to trudge a mile in waist deep mud than finish assignments or anything for that matter. Brand new experience and I’m not liking it so much. We are all so ready for a break, a long, long as in really, really long. But it seems soooo far away, especially now with that brick wall in the way! Sigh. Bigger sigh.
OK….where I was I going with this…Rats, can’t remember. Well, if it’s important I’ll think of it later… or not. Anyhow,
Staying focused seems to have become an impossibility, forget staying motivated. And it’s not just me, it’s the kids too. They are trying, but finding it so difficult to press on. We are all just plain pooped. Thoughts are scattered, papers are scattered, books are scattered – in fact the whole cotton-pickin’ house is scattered. But that’s OK, I’m pretty sure, but maybe not – will have to give that more thought later…if I remember.
Can you identify? It is driving me crazy!
Both kids including my soon-to-graduate granddaughter keep saying, “I just want to be done! I am so tired of school!” “I know what you mean, Honey”, I think to myself, “I just want to be done too!” But then I remember – I am the one who has to spur them on – one day, one assignment, one slow step at a time. Yikes!
“Come on. You can do it!” I speak to myself as much as to them.
I thought it must be just us or worse, just me – Sue, you ain’t no spring chicken anymore, ya know. But then, I discovered it isn’t just me or us. Other homeschoolers have also had a brick wall jump in front of them; We are not alone.
This past Tuesday for the first time, I attended a huge, very well-attended, annual home school book sale. I was shocked by the number of homeschoolers, selling and buying. But what surprised me the most was a dominant thread of conversation, both in conversations I had with people and in conversations I eavesdropped on – oops, I mean “overheard”. Over & over again people were saying how tired they were and how for the first time they couldn’t wait for school to be done. Numerous times I heard “We disparately need a break” and “It’s never been like this before.” It didn’t matter the age of the parent or the number of kids being homeschooled, or whether they were homeschooling little ones or high school kids. None of that mattered, the sentiment expressed was the same; people – parents and students alike are weary.
I took a measure of comfort knowing it isn’t just me or us. But, I am also curious why so many seem to feel this way. What is this brick wall so many home school families seem to be experiencing? Is it burn-out? Are we expecting too much of ourselves and/or our kids? Maybe I/we need to revisit our reasons for homeschooling. Maybe life is crowding in and we’re not leaving enough margin. I don’t know.
Need to give this more thought….. right after my nap.
May 2nd, 2009 10:07
“Are we expecting too much of ourselves and/or our kids?”
In the eyes of the general population homeschooling is still on probation, so we as homeschoolers may feel more pressure to really perform.
I think there is a balance between being too relaxed and not pushing ourselves or our children, and trying to do way too much. It is hard to find the balance, and I think the balance changes over time.
Henry Cate’s last blog post..The power of technology
May 5th, 2009 11:14
Thanks for the insightful comment, Henry.
I think you are right that we may feel pressure to perform, even after all these years and in spite of homeschoolers scoring well on standardized tests and successful college acceptance and performance.
I think pressure to “perform well” can come from many sources: those who don’t embrace homeschool as a “real” education, our trying to measure up to other homeschooling families with the “what” they’re doing and “how” they do it and/or from ourselves – am I doing enough?
A few years ago, I bought a set of note cards created by Todd Wilson, homeschooling dad and humorist. One of them shows a mom, obviously driving, looking in the rear view mirror. She is saying to her kids, “Now don’t mention that we didn’t get up till 9:30 or that your little brother can’t read…..and for goodness sakes try to act SMART!!!” The overriding caption for the card is “You know you’re a homeschooler when…you panic when your kids go to other homeschoolers’ homes.” I think it illustrates the pressures and unrealistic expectations we can place on ourselves.
Prayerfully and periodically checking the “heartbeat” of our homeschool is, in my humble opinion, a wise thing to do – especially when we’re feeling pressured, stressed, wornout, etc. Asking ourselves “what are we doing and why?” can help keep us on the track we want to be on rather than a track others are on. It can reveal underlying issues that may need to be addressed and help us determine if we need to “relax” or just the opposite, have we been too relaxed? Taking time to look at “what’s driving us” can help us keep that ever-fluctuating balance.